Thomas Wiesel - Conférence sur l'urgence climatique

I'm here to debrief. I had to sort things out a bit, otherwise I'd still be here at 11 PM. This is the second year in a row that I'm doing Alternatiba. I think it's part of the circular economy to recycle speakers. Thanks for inviting me back. I really like this conference, that's why I came back. I think it's rare to have a room where there are more Birkenstocks than car keys in the audience. And that's really nice. Speaking of Birkenstock, Mr. Dubochet is here, good evening. He came with his lookalike who is also here. It's like Saddam Hussein, in case of an attack, the lookalike takes the hit. That's why he's moving away from Mr. Dubochet. It's to divide the attackers. No, I really like this conference. I do a lot of corporate events, so I'm used to audiences that are a bit hostile to my message and that I have to win over so that by the end they end up thinking: Yeah, he's lefty, but he's funny. Whereas here, I feel a bit more at home. It's nice. It's the only place where someone who says his wife was arrested 7 times gets applauded. It's the only conference in the world where you see people walking in with Le Courrier under their arm. I'm a bit disappointed. There hasn't been a huge media impact for Alternatiba so far, apart from Le Courrier which talks about it a lot, a newspaper that has had a strong media impact, a strong commitment to the planet for a long time. And besides, they print fewer and fewer newspapers. But there was still an article about Alternatiba in the GHI, which said 'Pro-climate leaders meet in Geneva.' And I really liked that phrase, implying there are anti-climate leaders, and I propose that next time there's a conference with Nantermod and Luscher, we put: The summit of anti-climate leaders takes place in Geneva. That's why I like it here. I make anti-capitalist jokes and it gets applause, it's great. I really liked that Jonas put on a jacket so that our PLR friends would feel less out of place. Well played! I like it because I can come dressed like a slob, it blends in with the crowd, it's great. We had Mr. Longet with his FARC shirt coming back from the Colombian jungle. How is Ingrid Betancourt? Me, it's the second year I'm participating, Mr. Longet has been here for much, much longer than me and it shows. Alternatiba is not a walk in the park, it's quite anxiety-inducing. I think in his place, I would crack mentally and physically, and he holds up. By the way, he just turned 35, so congratulations to him. I really liked his speech. He talked about the consumer society he wants to fight against climate change with portmanteau words. He told us: 'We can't win the war against nature, and if we win it, we will have lost.' And that's profound. At first glance, it looks a bit like a Jean-Claude Van Damme quote from 2003, but actually... No, when you think about it, it's profound and it's true. He talked about the fact that we have the ability to speak well and act badly, and I agree that it's not a strategy that can last forever. Just ask Tariq Ramadan. And he highlighted the fact that in Geneva, you have already voted three times on ecological issues, which is good. Well, after that, you've already voted twelve times on the TPG ticket price, so we have room for improvement. Then we had Mr. Gomez. We felt his sympathies a bit, Mr. Gomez, because he introduced Ms. Steinberger and Mr. Hopkins with lots of compliments, and then the two representatives of the economy saying: They're here! He talked about the need to fight for the reduction of individual motorized mobility. And that's already a real success in Geneva. Because at rush hour, individual motorized mobility is 0 km/h, so you can hardly go lower than that. Mr. Gomez is in charge of the environment for the City of Geneva. By the way, in Geneva, across the whole canton, there's a big geothermal project. And Mr. Gomez is particularly suited to supervise that, because of all of us, he's the closest to the water tables. No, there you go... I had to have one, I had to have one. That'll be it, there won't be another. I still want to give a compliment. I think of all the green members of the Administrative Council, he's not the one doing the worst job right now. So congratulations to Mr. Gomez. It's more complicated for Ms. Perler, huh. Let's not hide it. I was shocked by the events that took place in Geneva. Geneva has become the base for eco-terrorism, and I think that's serious. First, there were dangerous anonymous activists who planted trees and that... Oh well, I'm flabbergasted, and then the violent activists who attacked defenseless asphalt. I saw unbearable images of a disfigured roadway... Sorry? They're in the room, on top of that, I feel bad. I was shocked. I changed my profile picture, I put 'I am asphalt'. I was really... #PrayForPaquis was really... They're in the room, but I know the police were able to react quickly since, by chance, they were right in the building next door in the Pâquis. Time to put their pants back on, they were there and... No, but we have to point out that the activists thought they had the right to do this action because they had an oral agreement with Frédérique Perler, and oral in the Pâquis is worth its weight in gold. That's my last joke about prostitution. I know, I'm also disappointed, but you shouldn't overdo a good thing. No, Ms. Perler, what she said is that she accepted this demonstration because she didn't realize what it entailed. She didn't realize that to plant a tree in the roadway, you had to remove the roadway. But it's not obvious, you know, for the director of the department of planning and construction. So you have to be tolerant. But fortunately, Geneva reacted well. You reacted well, you made reports, meetings, meeting minutes, and in the end, the Pâquis hole cost the Genevans 43,000 francs, including 3,000 francs in material damage and 33,000 francs for the extraordinary session of the municipal council during which they decided to decide nothing for the moment. When you know that these are the same people who declared a climate emergency, it forces optimism. Finally, there will be a fine, and I think it's good that there is a fine. I'm telling you, you're here. I think it's good that you have a fine because otherwise, it will give ideas to others. And I was in France on vacation this summer and I saw that the activists who made holes in the roadway have already spread everywhere. So really, it's time to react. Then we had Julia Steinberger who was with us, a great guest. Well, it depends why. She's at the top of my list if I organize a climate conference, but lower if I'm having a party. Well, the atmosphere won't be great. Hello everyone! Help yourselves to the appetizers. I remind you that the planet is dying. Take some, there's tomato juice, it's not always a wild atmosphere. The IPCC report has a tendency to calm the euphoria in crowds. It's a report that I think many of you here have read. I haven't read it. I read summaries of the report and it already scared the hell out of me. Well, sorry, I read summaries, summaries of the report and it... No, I'm not daring. Already, horror movies, I watched the scary scenes like this. But we talked a lot about the IPCC report that gives insomnia and it's true that it's the case. But I'd also like to defend the IPCC report a bit. When I'm not feeling well, I read the IPCC report to cheer myself up. Sometimes I feel bad and I think, 'Ah, but it can't last long...' Then I read two pages: 'Ah well no, it won't be long so...' It can be useful. Because these days I'm realizing that I don't handle heat well, and it turns out I'm less hot, less hot than the climate. And so, I'm not super eager for the future. I would have preferred the opposite realization: 'Oh no, actually it's cool when it's 40 degrees.' But no, I realize I don't handle heat well, and so I'm learning Icelandic. I'll keep you posted. Julia gave us a rather revealing and rather sad slip. She said 'In 2022, we took a big step, it's good that the IPCC was able to act, sorry, think' and it's true that that's a bit of the problem with our current society, that there are those who think and those who act, and it's not often the same people. For example, I do nothing, but there are those who do both. That's the case with Mr. Hopkins. What I liked about Mr. Hopkins' intervention was that he made jokes and you could see who laughed at the joke and who hadn't followed the English lesson well enough and laughed at the translation of the joke. But this translation mechanism is not bad. Because that way, if you're bilingual, you're the one who will remember Rob Hopkins the most, because you heard everything twice. He told us in particular: 'If it's not ridiculous, it's not ambitious enough.' And I think that was Pierre Maudet's motto. No, and I found it interesting, really, he hammered home that the climate emergency is here, but we still have time to tell half a Woody Allen movie and advertise a jazz artist who died 30 years ago, who thinks he's an angel from Saturn. In two languages. So apparently everything is fine: we're going to be saved by a time machine and a spaceship from Saturn that takes six parking spaces. So Mr. Gomez, you understand, you have to stop removing parking spaces, otherwise we're screwed. No, it was interesting, he really inspired me. So during his speech, I went on Amazon and bought ten beavers. There you go, if we make it, it'll be a bit thanks to me. You're welcome. Rob Hopkins is really a bit of the star of this edition on the Alternatiba website. They really promoted him. It says: his presence with us launches his tour in French-speaking Switzerland. I looked at his tour: Geneva, Lausanne, Yverdon, and Frick in Aargau. I hope he knows more about transition than about French-speaking Swiss geography. Well, he was highly anticipated on the transition network site, it says 'after canceling twice due to COVID: finally the French-speaking tour of Rob Hopkins.' And it's true that in French-speaking Switzerland, there are two events postponed due to COVID that we are eagerly awaiting. It's the Rob Hopkins tour and the Céline Dion concert. And there, we've already had one of the two, and that's already not bad. Mr. Hopkins has a very, very interesting life. He lived for several years in a Buddhist monastery and that's where he learned patience to repeat the same things for 20 years without anyone listening, and not insult everyone. It was a Buddhist monastery, but in Tuscany, that's a good compromise. When you want to learn zen, but still eat burrata, it's not bad. By the way, I followed less when he talked about urban agriculture, food security, because he's English, Rob Hopkins, he comes to talk to us about food. It's not credible. They don't have the same reality as us. We'll be starving to death while the English are picking up radioactive waste. 'Ooh it tastes like mint pudding you should try it' well, it won't be the same thing. He also told us that there needs to be more democracy. He wants it to be a daily practice. And I'm not sure that in Switzerland, we're up for it. Already, we're asked for our opinion four times a year. The German-speaking Swiss contradict us, that's enough for us. If we do that every day, getting rejected daily, we'll jump off a bridge. It won't be possible. Ooh, then we had the round table. Ooh la la, there were sparks. I really liked that. If we could have transformed the tension around that table into energy, we'd get through the winter without a problem. No, no, but they knew exactly what they were doing, Alternatiba. They presented this round table as a dialogue between the science of ecological transition and the representatives of the traditional economy. They really sold it as a close encounter of the third kind. 'You understand, when I talk to you?' It was really that. Did you see how polished they are, the PLR? I was impressed. They knew where they were stepping. They bring out the violin directly. 'Allow me to reiterate my thanks to the organizers.' 'I took off my tie, I gave a coin to the homeless on the way in.' 'I come in peace, Flower Power,' and then they go, they butter it up, several layers. 'Companies are exemplary, they make a lot of effort, there are strict rules' and normally it works. But when Vincent Subilia said, 'multinationals are at the forefront of efforts' Oooh, the audience woke up. After that, he still finished his tirade. There were two applause. So I didn't know you came as a family. That's cool. No, but it's true that it was a bit the subject this week, Jonas mentioned the outburst of Antonio Hodgers which didn't go down well. I saw an article in Le Temps where Mr. Subilia reacted, he said: 'Antonio Hodgers stigmatizes multinationals which are companies that create value, tax revenue, and jobs.' And that surprised me because I didn't know Mr. Subilia was an environmentalist, because he's sucking up to the multinationals so much, we call him the heat pump frankly! Yeah, I knew that one was a bit harsher, but it did me good. I also really liked it when Jonas asked him for examples of companies that are making efforts. He was a bit taken aback for a few seconds. 'Allow me to reiterate my thanks to the organi...' Then he quickly landed on his feet, he looked at the list of partners: Loyco, Patagonia, phew, that's good. I found 2. Patagonia, they're smart to sponsor this kind of thing. They know that when no one takes the plane anymore, we'll be forced to go camping and hiking. And that's jackpot for them. Well, after that, it seems to me, Mr. Subilia, you didn't cite an example of what they were really doing, but you raised your voice. That's a strategy that works well too. You said: 'Tell a father of a family that your job has to disappear, it's horrible,' that's true! No, it's so much cooler to tell him: well, keep your job in commodity trading, on the other hand, pay for swimming lessons for your kids because the water keeps rising, you know. No, I'm joking a bit, it's all fair in love and war, but I respect all opinions. I read Mr. Subilia, you said in the same Le Temps article 'The trickle-down phenomenon is real.' Each to their own beliefs, each to their own religion. I really have no problem with that. I'm not the one who's going to shatter your dream. I remember the person who told me Harry Potter didn't exist and I still hold a grudge. So, trickle-down, Vincent, really. We believe in it. In sustainable finance too. I feel a bit sorry for Ms. Kampfen and Mr. Subilia, the Winkelrieds of the evening. They're not used to there being people in Geneva who don't worship the economy. They're disconcerted. It's a topsy-turvy world for them. They'll leave here and tell at the next party meeting: 'Oh damn, guess where we went, it was a bad nightmare. What, they weren't swallowing our bullshit, it was horrible.' Fortunately, after we left, we went to eat at Lipp, phew, it was better. But the mere fact that they are here shows that even the friends of the economy are starting to want to act. Sometimes they say it a bit clumsily. Did you see Macron who said this week 'it's the end of abundance'? And there, 3/4 of the French replied: 'Oh, because there was abundance? Oh no, but because we thought there was no money. That's why we were earning minimum wage, but our bad, OK no problem.' No, but Macron had a flash, he thought it's the end of abundance. He knows because two days ago he was on his jet ski, and I don't know about you, but Manu and I, the jet ski, really makes us think, and there he thought: 'Ah, filling up cost me a fortune again, we're going to have to change something, so we're thinking about that.' The Federal Council will soon announce its measures to fight the shortage this winter. And that's a fairly delicate balance to find because on the one hand, we need to reduce consumption, but on the other hand, we must not touch the polluting sectors at all. So it's really quite tricky to do. So they tell us to put on a sweater instead of turning up the heat, delete emails with large attachments, and then you have Glencore there: 'Huh, what? We can't hear you with the noise of the machines in the cobalt mines, speak up!' Parmelin said this week by the way: 'For example, I'm the one who turns off the light in the press center once the journalists have left.' And I think that's great, except we've seen the press conferences, he's the first to leave. In fact, what he does is hide in the bathroom. Then he comes back to turn off the light once everyone has left. Oh no, but I know because I've watched a few press conferences. I still have nightmares about them. I don't know, in The Sixth Sense, the kid says to his shrink 'I see dead people,' for me it's 'I see the Vice-Chancellor of the Confederation André Simonazzi,' it's much more violent. No, but I think it's good that the Federal Council is acting to reduce emissions. Well, the seven of them have the carbon footprint of La Chaux-de-Fonds, but I think it's good that they... I remember last year, Guy Parmelin went to Japan by jet to meet the Emperor. He had a problem on the way, he missed his appointment with the Emperor. So, no one asked for my opinion, but as an economy measure, I think for example 'avoid going to Japan to not meet the Emperor.' Then apparently in the jet, he turned off the light when everyone was sleeping, so it's okay... No, but I know that by pointing fingers like that, I'm doing something unconstructive, which a lady in the back rightly denounced as being unconstructive. But I don't know how to do much else besides talk nonsense. On the other hand, I can point out those who talk less nonsense than me. That's the case of that lady who said 'Let's stop fighting and collaborate. We're all in the same boat' and I saw that Mr. Subilia really liked that metaphor because he jumped on it. He was this close to saying: 'Ah, that speaks to me. I love the Bol d'Or.' Then he started pointing fingers at those who want to save the planet while using a smartphone. So the truce was short-lived, but it existed for a few seconds. No, but we know it's going to be a mess and that's why evenings like this do good. It won't be enough to change the world, but it creates an energy, which is green, which is renewable, and which is essential, especially for thirty-somethings riddled with eco-anxiety like me. It's called hope and it can't be measured in kWh or cubic meters of gas, but it's a shortage that is just as important to avoid. And thank you to everyone who spoke tonight, almost, for allowing us to fill up on hope for free tonight. Thank you for listening.